It’s almost that time — and Santa still has a lot of stuff to do before heading out Christmas Eve:
- Add a new list category: naughty — nice — atrociously evil
and stupid political figures
- Get those Odor-Eaters for his boots
- Remember that smartphone, so he can text Mrs. Claus from the road
- Practice his creepy laugh to freak out the reindeer
- Update his list of houses without chimneys
- Pack the Lactaid
- Program the GPS for “everywhere”
- Remember the reindeer poop bags
- Make sure his insurance is up-to-date in case he crashes
- Buy a carton of Sharpies for the White House
Laurie Holman: Comedy Writer, Copywriter, Chocolate Connoisseur 